Wednesday, January 25, 2017

Are We Done Yet?

The fighting... my soul! The fighting has gotten out of hand. 

Let's forget the protests and marches for a minute. Zoom in on something small like, oh, any conversation thread on the internet these days. Threads are dripping for miles off of news articles, fake news articles, blog posts, posts on pages, posts in groups, posts all over the place. They don't even have to be related to politics at all. It seems every post you find always gets dragged straight back into politics or women's rights. 

Now, I have thoughts on these things. I do. Mostly, though, I am a watcher. I am watching, reading, listening, and trying to learn. My opinions are not valuable enough to share at the moment because I'm not always right.

There is one thing I do feel fairly confident saying, though. We have become our ugliest selves. We are safely behind our screen and 'standing up for ourselves or others' with our vitriol. Only, we are not. We are bathing in the anger of other people from our own home. We call our side of things a passion and their side crime against humanity. The result is the same all the way around, my friend. Nobody believes they are wrong and *nobody* changes their mind.

We don't have to be the bigger person when the opposing view chooses to be childish. I am reading that statement a lot. "I don't have to tolerate intolerance!" I see that one even more often. It seems, actually, that the main justification for behaving like hellish, hateful minions is, "But they do it first! They've always done it! I am only returning their own behavior!"

That doesn't stand up in parenting and it doesn't hold water in life, either. If my child is screaming at her sibling, I will not allow it. "Yeah, but SHE STARTED IT!!!" No. Just, no. Be the better person - both of you. Take the time you need to calm down and we will discuss this when we can do so reasonably. 

So, I ask with the exhaustion of a mother (citizen) whose children (the world) won't stop screaming. Are we done yet? Are we going to take responsibility for ourselves, one person at a time, and step back away from the keyboard until we can use human dignity with our fellow man? Are we going to remember that we are adults and that our *real* voice is best heard in contact with our state, local, and national representatives? 

This world hurts. There is pain everywhere. We are all hurting. Can't we just step outside of ourselves and realize that someone we insult over the internet is a whole entire human being worthy of love and respect? 

"Well, I cannot and will never respect it when... x, y, z." 

Yes, angry person. I get it. I'm not asking you to respect or tolerate ugliness. I am asking you to redirect your voice back to where it matters. Call your reps. Tell them those issues that matter to you, matter. Be the voice of the people in the only way which affects real change. If we go back to directing our voices to the government rather than each other, I guarantee it will have an impact. 

There are enough of us to do this, you know.

"Well, my kids need to see that I stand up for x, y, z. I am raising strong children who will matter in the world! I will not allow them to be trampled by my silence!" 

Duh! That is my entire point! They need to see you DOING. So go, do! Join a peaceful protest. Let them be near when you draft emails or letters. Work at a shelter, a soup kitchen, a pantry. Donate time, money, clothing, needed items. Human rights, activate! Put the phone on speaker when you call those reps. Work, work, work for that change! Never stop! But *do* stop spitting hatred in your home and online. "They started it!" won't make up for the damage we do to our kids. Exemplify active citizenship. Let them grow up strong and confident, not angry and bitter.

The best way to teach your child respect, personal responsibility, human rights, leadership, active citizenship is to participate. So do that. There is nothing but toxicity to be found in spilling your rage online at strangers. It only serves to build anger which we don't need to be spilling over into our homes and communities.

*Disclaimer... I don't have it all figured out. I do not have all the answers. I did not post this because I am full of myself. I am just sick to death of all of the fighting and I wish we could all take a step back and evaluate how we are behaving towards each other and whether it really helps our personal causes. I am working on me. I am the only person I can work on. <3 

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